The stand off voltage are guaranty by design. If it is designed for certain voltage, you should really follow it.
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As of your switching problems, the "universal" solution is using relays.
And for muting-while-switching, use some SS device (probably a FET) which will be faster than the relay contact (an LDR will act after the pop), and avoid high signal voltage problems by muting at a point where signal is less than 60Vpp ... or even lower.
Absolute worst case, you pad your signal to manageable levels and then reamplify it.
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